Sunday, November 23, 2008

Random Vignettes II

So one of my potential suitors called me an angel last night. Which of course I am. He then laughed at the irony of finding an angel in the Intimate Encounters section of a website. Hey- angels have needs too, you know?

Then I found a gentleman from the province next door. I mentioned that I had met one person from the site, and he wanted to know ALL the details. I felt like simply directing him to this blog. I don't do erotica on demand. I asked him to relate some of his stories to me and suddenly he lost interest.

I got a message from a 73 year old man this week. 73. Hey, nothing wrong with wanting a little action your entire life. That's cool. But honey? That's my Dad's age. No way.

I've noticed that most men on the site proclaim how much they love to give oral. Is that really true I wonder? Or do they just think that's what we want to hear? I'm OK with blow-jobs, but I only occasionally crave it. So if my love is 50% of the time or less, I'm not going to get all gushy about my need for it in my profile. I do my best not to be misleading.

Now tonight I ran into the first person that I ever started talking to on the site. I remember that he was really sweet - but tonight, he was much more aggressive. He was quite insistent on coming over. Honestly, I thought he really wasn't into me, because I actually emailed with him a few times and was only getting 3 word responses. I felt like I was carrying the team. I do need to be intellectually stimulated to get aroused.

And men? Seriously. Please practice your typing skills. I can totally play the coquette with 4 or 5 men at once before it gets tiring. I shouldn't have to wait 5 minutes between responses for you. Especially when your comments aren't that note-worthy.

Duchess out.


Nolens Volens said...

Now, that's a smackdown! I love it! :)

The Duchess said...

Too harsh?

Aurore said...

I have often wondered why every guy on the site I frequent claims not only to love giving oral but to be a master at it. I would rather they were honest especially after you've been with them and it's clear that they don't even know where the clit is located.

I to have been propositioned by men older than my dad, who can't seem to understand why I would find that at all disturbing. One even went so far as to tell me he found someone younger than me to sleep with...*shudders*.

You definitely nailed some of the less appealing parts of the "intimate" section ;)

L. said...

*giggles at the oral comment* I know. I find it more annoying and eyebrow-raising, all those consistent claims as to the love of oral. I file it under Methinks They Doth Protest Too Much.

Cheating Wife said...

Nothing worse than silly gramatical errors ruining perfectly good sex. ;-)

(I mean that, it is a pet peeve of mine...have nearly broken SG of that over the years, almost.)


Anonymous said...

Anyone who doubts my love of oral or my cunnilingus skills should read some of my posts and then make plans to meet me in person....Satisfaction guaranteed and no reciprocation required.

Helen said...

Oh, yeah. I identify. Some guys? Interacting with them just feels like WORK.

And I'm not even getting paid for it. Now, nothing against my sisters in the sex work industry; in fact I think it should be legal, to let us better concentrate on the deadly serious crime of human trafficking -- but I'm not gonna turn pro. I'm strictly playing in the elite amateur leagues here, which means if I'm not getting paid, it better be fun.

But a lot of guys seem to think that I'm here to entertain them, or that I'm applying for a position in their bed. Um, no.

One word in favor of the older guys -- y'all can take 'em or leave 'em, but sometimes the old are actually wise, and if they are, they've stopped scoring themselves by how they score, and it makes them a lot more fun to be with than the guys who really need something out of you to bump up their own self-esteem.

One of my favorite playmates doesn't actually hold an AARP card, but still cracks me up when we laugh about trying to get the senior-citizen discount at the check-in desk (And with a full head of white hair? He might get it. Thrifty!). What do I care? He's still great in the sack, and good-looking in that good-looking older guy way, which I'm kinda into.

Anonymous said...

The guy who you didn't think was that into you until he agressively insisted on seeing you TONIGHT-- He sounds exatly like my Frat Boy.

Honestly...I just don't get men!!