Sometimes I wonder if I'm not what people would label as a selfish lover. It's not that I don't care about my partner's satisfaction - on the contrary, my ego demands that whomever I'm with be taken care of, even to the sacrifice of my own gratification.
By selfish, I mean that I get annoyed when men try to prove how long they can last without paying attention to my ultimate boredom, or by forcing me to service them for too long without paying attention to my subtle cues of being "over it." Sometimes I feel it's a form of dominance or ego on their part. Either way, I tend to lose patience with it quickly.
Perhaps it's because this lack of psychic synchronicity implies a seeming disconnect. An apparent disregard in finding a mutual rhythm or shared experience. It implies that each of us has entered into the moment without a common goal.
Even in the absence of romantic love, it seems to me that to people coming together in this expression of lust-filled vulnerability should share a reciprocal sense of what the moment is meant to achieve.
However I find that I often have no interest in seeking out that kind of synchronicity if it simply isn't there. I'm not in the mood to cater to men's egos or be subservient to their needs.
So what is the solution? In the short-term, I think I've found one.
For me I mean.
I think I should find myself a man who is completely willing to bow to my desires alone.
I've constructed an ad for such a man - tell me what you think:
Job Description: The main focus of the work will be in satisfying whatever particular need I have that day. Examples of duties may include, but are not limited to the following: full-body massage, nipple sucking, making out for hours, hard fast fucking, painting my nails, feeding/bringing me ice cream, boudoir photography sessions, dressing and undressing me etc.
Qualifications: Will be looking for demonstrable skills in the tongue and hands, ability to achieve and maintain multiple erections over extended or repeated periods in a variety of circumstances, willingness to serve without complaint, not allergic to feathers or latex, a steady and creative hand with a camera.
References: Will be amusing to read, but not necessary. A "hands-on" audition/interview is a must.
While the slave's gratification is not the immediate concern, of course should he achieve satisfaction I will be very pleased
Please forward applications to: firstname.lastname@example.org including cover letter and photo.