Reflection

I looked in the mirror as I waited for him to arrive- anxiously fussing over every minute detail. Did my black lace panties cover enough? Was my silky camisole just clingy enough? Did the satin robe disguise that which I didn't wish to accentuate?

I was prepared to neurotically analyze his every touch, movement and glance. Where did his eyes linger? Why? We as women are experts at the millisecond snap conclusion, whether they were rational or logical conclusions rarely entered into the equation.

Was I not thin enough? Did I really turn him on? Was he fantasizing about someone tighter or sexier? Someone unashamed to greet him at the door not wearing a loosely sashed robe, no matter how alluringly arranged?

I heard his hand on the doorknob and posed enticingly within view.

He gave time to neither analayze nor come to any conclusions- snap or otherwise.

The second he was in the room he slipped his hands beneath my robe and crushed me to him. His lips murmuring soft nothings and his tongue roaming over my ear lobe, my neck, my clavicle...His fingers squeezing my breasts, clutching my hips to his. Were we both naked, he would have been fucking me right there in the hallway.

He tossed away the robe and went back to his explorations- tugging me impatiently towards the bedroom, maneuvering me onto the bed.

I lay on my back and he pulled off his shirt and pants with no care for neatness or concern for how they landed. He climbed up and straddled me, simply looking down - his eyes devouring my nearly naked form. I squirmed with both discomfort at his intense gaze, and with delicious anticipation with what his hands and tongue would do next.

I could see his erection through his shorts, yet I had barely touched him. He claimed to have been thinking of me all day. Of getting home and getting me naked. All he wanted was to run his hands and tongue over every inch of my hot flesh. Just the fantasy of that sustained him through an otherwise tedious afternoon.

Now that the reality was in front of him - my body that he continued to undress as he spoke- he apologised that it would be unlikely that he would be able to take things slow - the first time. However he promised to more than make it up to me the second, third and fourth time.

At that point my insecurities vanished. For one shining moment I saw myself reflected through his eyes. Through his fantasies and his desires. He didn't see an extra few pounds, an imperfect tan, a misplaced freckle. He saw the true woman in front of him.

A sensual, open, wanton creature. A woman perfectly willing to perform any number of unmentionable acts with him. And that? Is sexy.

Care to read the rest of the group? Find out what sexy things they saw reflected?

Hubman
Pink Vixxxen
Ms Scarlett
Veronica
Enchanted Mistress
Petal
Aurore
Topaz
Ronjazz
Autumn
Library Vixen
Bri
Lolita
Danimo
Britni
Adulterous Letch

And as always, our charming hostess: Kimberly

The Duchess Memes

Here are the rules:

1. Mention the person (or people) who tagged you - this would be my darling Topaz
2. Complete the lists of 8s.
3. Tag 8 other bloggers and let them know they have been tagged.


8 things I am looking forward to:
- This weekend
- The end of this diet I'm on
- the next email from my latest online conquest
- going to bed tonight
- the next group post on Saturday
- receiving my new toys from both Calexperts and PinkCherry.com
- my next paycheque
- my next kiss

8 things I did yesterday: (not so interesting due to the circumstances)
- called in sick with a migraine
- slept in deliciously late
- watched a bit of the Empire Strikes Back on Spike
- read a book
- answered work emails from home
- paid for my car insurance
- ate asparagus soup
- called my building manager


8 things I wish I could do:
- have sex tonight
- fit into a size 6
- eat chocolate without guilt
- write better
- drive standard
- see without corrective lenses
- read Jane Eyre without falling asleep
- public speak without freaking out

8 shows I watch:
- Supernatural (As Topaz said, cause Dean is a God)
- Ugly Betty
- Dollhouse
- Lost
- The Mentalist
- Criminal Minds
- Bones
- Buffy/Angel/Firefly on DVD


8 favourite fruits: (I like the classics)
- Apple (red)
- banana
- avocado
- tomato
- grapes (green)
- strawberry
- pineapple
- pear

8 places I'd like to travel:
- England
- Russia
- Norway
- California
- New York
- Quebec
- France
- Greece

8 places I've lived:
-Canada

Who to tag? Everyone already has done this. So I tag anyone reading. If you do it, let me know and I promise to comment with something absolutely riveting.

People Like My Words...

I've had the good fortune to have some of my posts featured on a couple of sites lately...

The Erotic Woman and Good Vibes Magazine.

Why don't you head over there and show them some love?

Yearning

I lay in bed thinking about him, wishing that I wasn’t. Thinking leads to touching. Touching leads to feeling. Feelings lead to associations. The thought of him associated with those intimate touches. So easily slipping into a fantasy of him touching me, rather than the stark reality.

I am alone in my bed, squirming restlessly at the image of him in my mind. Inescapable. Taunting.

It’s true what they say- that there’s a fine line between love and hate. Fortunate then that I wasn’t in love with him. This was merely a crush. An infatuation. A passing fancy even.

But the fine line I was straddling? Not between love and hate – but between lust and decorum. Decency and recklessness. Propriety and carelessness.

I wanted him. Perhaps he knew it. Perhaps he recognized the symptoms. He continued to be as agreeable as ever, yet gave no sign of encouragement. Disappointing.

The passion and unfulfilled lust fueled my anger and frustration. What is at the moment a mere crush, could quickly turn to resentment and rejection. Soon I would become cold and aloof in an attempt at self-preservation.

All this was in my head of course. The possibility exists that he knows nothing at all of my yearning. Surely he would react in some way if he suspected what he became to me at night. Alone. In my bed. How he became my object. My slave. There only to venerate and pleasure me.

It seemed impossible to me suddenly that the acts that he and I practiced in each night would not psychically resonate with him in some way. How as is it that each night for hours on end, he could engage in the most primal acts of carnal violation and not know it?

How could he not sense how intimately and thoroughly and creatively we explored each others’ bodies? I felt that my longing should have crashed over him in waves.

How I wanted to taste his tongue and let my hands roam all over him. That I wanted to experience his arousal. To own it. To create those same associations of lust and heat in his head that he had already created in mind.

Could the universe have such a cruel sense of humour? To gift one person with this sense of passion and heat yet grant the other with obliviousness, or at best neutrality? Surely the gods would plan it better than that. It seemed like such a waste to allow such discordant energies to simply waft into obscurity.

But I sensed no such mystical connection between us. No surreptitious glances from him, nor any heroic effort at self-restraint. He was simply…content as we were. Or so he believed that we were. Or worse, as he hoped that we were. Friendly acquaintances.

Has there ever been a more desolate sounding phrase? Friendly acquaintances. Who in the history of man has ever wished for such mediocrity?

Why wouldn’t you covet surging passion and incapacitating desire? To know that someone longs to enslave you in a state of sublime wanton bliss. How could a person settle for anything less once they’ve experienced that?

But he doesn’t know. Perhaps he’s never tasted it – the knowledge that someone next to him is quivering with licentious ardor and he is the object. That while I smile pleasantly and respond inanely my eyes are devouring him.

My demure lowering of eyelashes disguises the truth. The image flashing through my head of crawling into his lap, putting my tongue in his mouth while feeling his mounting hardness, and brushing my breasts against his chest.

If he could catch a glimpse of the fantasies in my head I wonder how he would react. Shock? Alarm? Or would the heat penetrate him? Create unexpected sensations in the most intimate of places?

Although far from virtuous, my intentions towards him were honourable. I had no plans to lure him to my lair and seduce him unwillingly. No schemes to flirt and grope and make him uncomfortable.

Such a pity that one cannot simply revel in the make-believe. That one cannot merely covet and be coveted without thought for the consequences. Consequences. Those intangible results utterly tainting my caramel-flavoured thoughts.

So I lie in bed each night. Continuing the violation of bodies alone. Struggling to command feelings of resentment and imaginary rejection with those of liquid heat and arousal.

Pleasurists #40

via taraxos

Pleasurists is a round-up of the adult product and sex toy reviews that came out in the last seven days from bloggers all around the sex blogosphere. Did you miss Pleasurists #39? Read it all here. Do you have a review for Pleasurists #41? Submit it here before Sunday August 9th at 11:59pm PDT. Please re-post this list on your own blog if listed.

Want to win some free swag? All you’ve got to do is enter.

• Tantus Giveaway! Deadline: August 8th at 11:59 pm PDT.


• Steal our Blog and win $100 Deadline: August 28th.


• Our First Contest! Deadline: August 31st.


• Hello Kitty Vibe photo contest Deadline: September 1, 2009.

Madame Editrix

Scarlet Lotus St. Syr

On to the reviews…

Editor’s Pick

• Femblossom with heat by Carnivalesq



I really did not think I was going to like the heat feature. I thought it would be too hot, or that the heat just wouldn’t be my thing, or that the Emotional Bliss people were downright weird for making a heated vibrator. I’m so glad to tell you kind folks that I was dead wrong.

Vibrators

• Comparing the Hitachi, Magic Massager & My Magic Massager by Dangerous Lilly


• Comparing the Acuvibe, Acuvibe Mini & Ideal by Dangerous Lilly


• Vibratex Starburst by Domina Doll


• omG G-Spot stimulator by Valynn


• LELO Liv by Eliot Bodem


• The Cone by Domina Doll

Dildos

• Candy Cane by True Pleasures


• Jollies Original by Essin’ Em


• Tantus Purr by The Duchess


• Tantus Goddess by Miss KissThis

Anal Toys

• Flexi Felix by Carnivalesq


• Tantus B-Bomb by Laurel
  


• Luxotiq Anal Plug by Carrie Ann


• Tantus Ryder by Valynn


• NobEssence Romp by Miss KissThis


• Tristian Taormino’s Anniversary Edition Plug by Him & Her

Lube, Massage Oil, Bath Stuff, & etc.

• Gun Oil H2O by Bill Turner


• Bwarm Soy Massage Candle by Miss KissThis


• Kama Sutra’s Treasures of the Sea & Bathing Gel by Domina Doll

BDSM/Fetish

• Door Jam Cuffs by True Pleasures


• Door Jam Cuffs by Beautiful Dreamer

Adult Books

• Pleasure Bound: True Bondage Stories by Sarah Estrella

Adult Movies/Porn

• Ashley and Kisha by Domina Doll


• Nina Hartley’s Guide to Stripping for Your Partner by Carnivalesq


• Pro-Ball Cheerleaders (Remastered Grindhouse Edition) by J.D. Bauchery


• The Portal by FrzKey


• Bella Loves Jenna by The Porn Librarian


• The Pinch by J.D. Bauchery


• Taboo Charming Mother Vol. 1-Unfulfilled Wife by FrzKey


• Triple Play Solo Edition by Eliot Bodem


• Hardcore Circus by Epiphora

Sex Furniture

• Liberator Freestyle by Miss KissThis

Lingerie

• Penthouse Signature Stretch Lace Panty by Sommer Marsden


• Satin Chemise Set by HotMoviesForHer Sex Toy Crew

Miscellaneous

• Liberator Fascinator Throe by Nadia


• Burning Angel’s Spiked Duotone Balls by HotMoviesForHer Sex Toy Crew


• Vibrating Velvet Harness by Epiphora

Erotica and Porn

One of the comments that the author makes in the "Down and Dirty" book is that she uses the terms erotica and pornography interchangeably. She is quite frankly bored with the argument regarding the differences between the two.

Now the fact that she easily uses one term or another implies to me that she doesn't believe that there is a difference between the two concepts. On that point, I quite vehemently disagree with her.

I suspect that the standard colloquial view of pornography is that it is simply some form of visual stimulation focussed on intercourse. Perhaps the more soft-core examples of this are termed "erotica" and the more hard-core versions are viewed as the real "porn."

I know that when I browse the erotica section of the PPV menu on my TV, I can scarcely tell the difference between the titles of "erotica" vs "adult." According to my cable provider, the difference between the two appears to be the price tag.

Can you tell me, darling readers, what the obvious difference in genres is between titles such as "Carnal Lust" and "Date with a Porn Star" vs "Brazilian Sex Island" and "Really Deep Throats." I'm curious to know which of you would guess correctly which title belongs in which category.

Now when actually viewing the two genres, the difference is as basic as soft and hard core. "Erotica" films are less varied, more tentative and only shows a limited amount of skin. Whereas with "porn" or "adult" films, there seem to be no limitations at all. The viewer experiences full-on, raunchy skin and thrusting. It's much more...stimulating, and impossible to fake.

I imagine the same may hold true for the written version of the same categories. More "romance" and an attempt at a storyline in erotica, vs the more carnal limited scope of porn.

However, in my mind, this is all simply theory. The differences I've described above are what I've observed from society. It's not how I really feel on the matter. What is outlined above is a watered down version of the truth. A truth that I believe is much more stark.

To me, soft-core, hard-core, it's all erotica as long as there is the element of willing consent. Whether that consent is masked by apparent refusals or not. If both partners are willing participants in the event - no matter how kinky or painful- that is erotica.

Pornography? Is degrading. Is damaging. Is demeaning and unhealthy. I suspect by it's very definition, porn is at it's core a negative concept. Think of all the legal associations with it.

And erotica? That is a beautiful form of sensual expression in all its forms.

To use the terms interchangeably I find to be both ridiculous and insulting to this beautiful community that I have become a part of.

I would genuinely like to hear your thoughts on the matter.

Tantus Silicone Purr Dildo

The delectable Christina at Tabu Toys was kind enough to send over my first dildo.
That's right my darlings, I've got a rainbow of vibes in all shapes, sizes and colours - but until now, I'd never had a dildo.

The Tantus silicone purr dildo was an excellent first sampling I must say.

The details: As you can see in the photo it is ribbed (for our pleasure!) and is dishwasher safe and phthalate free.

Now what is it that I've always preferred vibes to dildos? Well because of the vibrations of course! So silly of me to have such a narrow-minded view of this toy. Guess what darlings? It came with an removable micro-vibe. I should have known that Christina would take care of me.

You know what else she sent me? The Tantus suction cup accessory. That's right kids. I can stick that vibe onto any smooth surface and ride it to my heart's content. Perhaps I should start a series that discusses all the places I've found to suction it...

Now, I'm sure you're all dying to know about all the naughty little thoughts, feelings and reactions I had while using the toy. Let me tell you all about it.

This is not a small toy, nor is it excessively huge. If you prefer a smaller toy then you may be intimidated by this. I found it just enough of a challenge to make it worth working a bit for. I mean if it's too easy am I really going to appreciate it?

Once again, I am delighted with the addition of a bit of lube on my adult toys. I have no idea how I ever got along without it. And I found it absolutely imperative with this one.

So one hot night I loaded up some erotica, pulled out my toy box, lubed this up and off I went. Now those ridges? Yeah, I felt them. In a good but subtle way. Same with the vibrations. Nice, and definitely felt, but subtle.

Now part of the reason that I've always leaned towards vibes is because of the clit stimulator option. I personally found that this toy was most effective to me when I paired it up with one. I was enjoying the stimulation without anything extra- but when I added another toy specifically for my clit - well then the two of them made it positively mind-blowing. I loved the feeling of both together.

And the micro-vibe? Could have served the same purpose. But I'm greedy, I want it all...

So all in all, a delicious first time dildo experience. I definitely misjudeged their potential.

Duchess rating: 3 stars out of 5.